We were all teens once. Remember dragging yourself out of bed, brushing between your braces and covering zits with acne cream, just so you could be teased on the bus, shunned by the popular table and kept after school because the dog really did eat your homework? By today’s standards, these are comical challenges.

Strength of Character

Teens today don’t all have Barbie doll figures or genius IQs any more than they did in our day. The main difference between then and now is the Internet, and the speed with which news of an embarrassing incident can make its way into the hands of classmates. Sadly, we can’t control the behavior of children at large. Instead, we need to concentrate on raising strong kids who feel good about their identities, abilities, relationships and physical traits.

Emotional Rollercoaster

Teens’ experiences vary, and so do their moods. Some may feel good about friends and family, achievements and appearance. Others may struggle with every new challenge, and doubt themselves often. If your teens are struggling, try to engage them in activities that will encourage them to feel good about themselves. Positive experiences serve to level out the emotional peaks and valleys that characterize this time in their lives.

Growth Opportunities

What a high school student goes through each day can make or break his spirit. As often as possible, try to include your teen in activities that may bolster his confidence and make him feel good about himself. Teens need positive opportunities to do the following. Be

Proud

Teens are not too old to try new hobbies, sports, lessons and activities that may spark a passion and inject a little adrenaline into their self-images. Sometimes we forget that they’re still children, because often they’re bigger than we are! Help them to find what they’re good at, so they can shine.

Handle Disappointment

We all want our kids to be liked and successful. Unfortunately, teens often get a dose of unhappiness. Whether excluded from a clique, cut from a team or failed by a teacher, most teens face social or academic disappointment sooner or later. Help your teen to face it by reminding him that his worth as a person is much greater than the importance of any discouraging episode. When you help him to move forward, you help him to increase his resilience and confidence in the face of adversity. With your guidance, this will pass, and there will be other teams, friends and classes.

Feel Needed

Teens who help to care for younger siblings and elder relatives have a valuable opportunity to develop feelings of self-worth. Trusting your teen to be responsible for others is a positive demonstration of your belief in him. A bad day at school is like a bad day at work. It’s nice to have a loving family to come home to.

Be Stylish

Is blue hair at the dinner table really so bad? Clothes and hairstyles that don’t conflict with school dress codes need not be grounds for battle. Teens like to experiment with self-expression and develop their own styles. While some may find it embarrassing, I have found that a happy blue-haired child is better than a depressed brunette.

Get Help

Your teen is going through a transformation from child to adult, and may benefit from talking to a professional to figure things out. If you suspect depression, an eating disorder, or substance abuse, intervene before it escalates. There’s no shame in seeking help, only in failing to do so.

When we believe in our teen children, and give them opportunities to develop character, we help them to discover their strengths, and face the challenges of growing up.

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Image Courtesy: Andrejs Pidjass